07/05/10

As promised, I am trying to keep posting one everyday so here I am, blogging.

This might just be another useless blabbing but whatever.

Happy July 4th.

United States Independence day- :)

what I did?? I went with P'yod to watch fireworks at one of the park i don't even remember the name. It was okay.. watchable, nothing big compared to ones back home.

Today is a public holiday. So, Thais and I went to laguna beach in portage- twenty minutes from kalamazoo. and urhhh I thought we were gonna go at 4 but due to miscommunication I had to leave home unshowered. Oh god, my period came right when it's the hardest time to find a tampon. I had to walk all the way front to the ladies just to check if there was any coin operated tampon dispenser. Then I left the beach with my other thai friend.

well, now that i'm in my bedroom PMSing, i realize that i have issues. the issue that i know that has always cause me problems. I should have known better. I ignored the issue and pretend/lie to my self that it's no big deal. It's the biggest deal indeed. *sigh*

I hate myself. I need to boost up my self esteem and to make believe that I'm worth the risk, that I'm not useless and that i make differences in life. IDK, but lately i've been so upset with myself in lots of things.. Maybe I should just list this down and improve myself little by little.

So here it is:

- procastination

- socialization

- self expression

- self worth

that's all i can think as of now. I'm surprised. However, these may seem to be little but it has huge impact in my life. HUGE.

i shall come up with ways to deal and handle these issues!

07/05/10

made someone so jealous today! lol